Have you ever worked with someone who seemed particularly grumpy and rude? Or watched someone blaze by you on the road in a dangerous way? I’m curious to know how that makes you feel, if stuff like that often angers you, then listen up!

Try to give others the benefit of the doubt. To enumerate, giving people the benefit of the doubt is to assume that other people have the best of intentions or reasons for their behavior.  Although it is probably not true, hear me out.

Defaulting to giving the benefit of the doubt makes your expectations more reasonable for your own life.  In the moments when you get in someone’s way, or act out of character, you have a larger tolerance for your own behavior because you practice it on other people.  It is important not to be too hard on yourself, because a lot of the time it is a destructive behavior.

Not to mention, giving the benefit of the doubt could restore your faith in humanity, which in turn makes you more open to connecting with and supporting others. This is a great trait to have because small interactions have the ability to bring a lot of joy into your life. 

So, the next time someone does something that seems out of place or irritates you, use it as a reminder that you don’t know their whole story, and maybe they are acting within reason for their purposes. And even so, remember that even though some things that happen to you are out of your control, the way you perceive it isn’t.  The same applies here, make it a normal thought pattern.

I want to bring in my buddy, Matt Sheldon, who is a professional Soccer player and founder of the successful soccer platform Become Elite, who shares an unpopular opinion about goal setting.  

"There has been a lot of studies that show if you go tell people about your goals and how people hold you accountable for you goals, then yes, it is a much better chance that you are going to achieve it. However, it also can work in the reverse affect if you are just telling everybody just to tell, because if you go and meet with somebody and you tell somebody about what you want to work too, whether you want to do something to improve your life, it triggers an affect that makes you feel like you already accomplished something. Telling somebody and receiving that gratification triggers the same response that you have already succeeded in something. You should be very selective about who you tell your goals too, because most people will not hold you accountable to what you want to achieve. You need to find people who are going to check in on you in a month, two months, and ask about your goals. If those people are not going to hold you accountable for those goals, then do not tell them your goals or else it actually creates the adverse affect for you".

Only share your goals with those who will hold you accountable to them, everyone else is just noise.

This message comes from Luann Con and she teaches us this simple, but effective trick.

"I had to start something big and symbolic and way outside my comfort zone. We could not think of anything bigger than the polar bear plunge in Atlantic City, New Years Day. I am terrified of the ocean. I do not go into the ocean in the middle of summer much less the middle of winter. And I hate the cold. When we get there, I am shaking in my bathing suit, and I am thinking I'd like to quit before we even start. Fortunate, this lovely guy in a speedo who I do not know, grabs my hand and pulls me into the ocean and I fall face down. Something happened. There was a shift. I felt different. I felt exhilarated and alive in a way I haven't faced in a long time. An that is the first day I felt the power of Do the New".

In the Ted Talk, she goes on to talk about the science of do the new, which essentially wakes up our brain from autopilot and helps us process time and also give us a kick of dopamine too.

So, I want to share a bit about a tip we take for granted.  In the United States, we have this little holiday called Thanksgiving, where everyone takes a moment to reflect what they are grateful for. As great of an occasion that is, once a year is not enough, gratitude should be a central component to every day.  

Practice Gratitude.  I was fortunate enough to learn about the power of gratitude from a pioneering gratitude researcher at UC Davis named Dr. Robert Emmons.  The studies conducted by Dr. Emmons found that being grateful has many benefits. Physically, it will strengthen your immune system, psychologically it will elevate your mood, and socially it will make your more generous and outgoing.  

A few techniques you can use to be more grateful today include keeping a gratitude journal, or keeping your change in a gratitude jar that you then give to a person in need when the jar is filled. The way I incorporate gratitude in my day, is every morning when I wake up and I step off my bed, I have the expression “feet hit the floor, 3 things I am grateful for”.  I then take a minute to reflect on a few blessings in my life.  

It doesn’t matter which way it comes, but what does matter is that it is part of your life

Park your car in the back of your parking lot. I have to admit, I got this one from my grandma, whose health and energy level prove the efficacy of the tip.

It turns out that we have a pretty big misunderstanding about exercise. As great as big workouts are for building muscle or endurance training, small acts of exercise throughout the day are just as important in more subtle ways. Our bodies are more naturally designed to be stimulated by exercise throughout the day, and parking in the back of a parking lot gives you the 2 minute walk your body craves to be functional. 

Considering that many of us drive cars everywhere we go, this simple decision could be enough to add 10 mini workouts to your day. With this micro-stimulation, your body experiences physiological benefits that improve your metabolism, decrease your blood pressure, and expel stress.

So try it today, or tomorrow, or whenever you have a few extra minutes when running an errand. Get that little walk in and note how it makes you feel. If you like it, give it another try. Just one more way to get on the road to being healthier

I’m going to challenge you with this one because it is really uncomfortable by nature, but if you can manage it, you are 10 steps ahead of everyone else. The reason it’s so hard to do is literally because only one person can do it.

Challenge yourself to be the person that goes first. Whether you speak first in a string of presentations, ask the first question after a speech, or even you’re the first one to go down a scary waterslide, going first is a small act but has large implications.  

One part is the mentality associated with it. Going first requires confidence because you are the one to break the barrier and set expectations for everyone else, which is a lot of pressure. This is just like standing out in a crowd. This also builds a confidence that will be on display in other parts of your life.

The second part is what it can do for relationships. We all have a natural egocentrism, and place a huge priority on things that pertain to ourselves. This means that when we are waiting for our turn, we pay less attention to other people until we have had our turn. By going first, you can give everyone your full attention. Also, you will be better positioned to have a more productive follow up with that individual that will strengthen the relationship.

Implementing this tip is pretty easy. Make yourself go first the next time you can. It’ll be nerve-wrecking, and uncomfortable, but for the best. Just do it and find out why!

Chalene Johnson is a fitness influencer who has built a great personal brand through curiosity marketing. Let’s hear from Chalene as she describes why curiosity is so strong.  

Johnson states, "Our brains do not like to have a gap. It's like when your parents gave you a little bit of information when you were little, and you knew it wasn't the whole story, so your mind fills in the gaps. We want to connect the dots. So, when we can't connect the dots, it is a more powerful captivator than even our fear of loss is our desire to quench our thirst for curiosity".
This message is to instill curiosity in those around you. This is a really good way of getting your audience to engage with your message because it works within our natural inclination to seek more information. A few things Chalene does on her social media accounts to drive engagement is she generates curiosity by being intentionally vague and planning follow up posts that answer questions she asks. She has used curiosity marketing to do a great job selling not only her products, but herself.

Let us welcome Erik Eklund, a Swedish keynote speaker and storyteller. Eklund shares a bit about the two ways that we perceive our goals known as Approach and Avoidance Behavior.

"What do you want? It is one of life's most commonly asked and received questions. Yet, it is one of life's most difficult ones to answer. Now, consider this, our goal in life goes in one of the two ways. We either move towards them or away from them. This is known as the Approach and Avoidance Behavior. In avoidance, we are on the defense. We keep seeing the risks of negativity, and we limit everything in our life's. We wave things for what we want to happen to us. However, in approach, we are on the offense. We see the rewards and the possibilities. We strive to open up for opportunities and to create and make it happen. In approach, we can achieve what, at first, seemed impossible. So, here it is. Tip of the day is to get extreme clarity on what team you are on. So, here you go! My question to you is what do you want? If your answer begins with what you do not want, as in 'I do not want to feel hurt, or I do not want to have a bad relationship. Then, you are on the defense team of Avoidance. Move into offense. Move into the Approach team. Raise your standards and make it happen. What team are you on? The defense or the offense".