I was looking a bit into the story of Ellen DeGeneres, and I was inspired to hear a bit about her life, and the obstacles she has faced to become who she is.  She lived privately as a homosexual for a long time, and even had to deal with the tragic death of her girlfriend.  She slowly worked her way through the entertainment ranks, and found herself as the star of her own tv series and was killing it.  She then made a move that put her entire career in jeopardy, and came out in a large and unexpected publicity stunt.  She had a tough time securing work for many years and thought it was the end.  

Ellen has been through a lot in her life, and everything she experienced has contributed to the person and comedian she is today, which is one of the most beloved daytime tv host in the industry.  And knowing that it wasn’t always that way makes her influence that much more meaningful.

More recently, she had the opportunity to play Dory in the movie Finding Nemo. Dory dealt with many of her own challenges, and approached her issues with her own philosophy, drawing many parallels to Ellen and the way she approaches her own life. The movie is about the most improbable quest of retrieving Nemo from across the world, and Ellen’s famous line embodies the main message in the story. “just keep swimming”.

It’s a powerful quote that has meaning both within the context of the movie and life in general.  In the movie, “just keep swimming" was the necessary action to accomplish the large feat of crossing the ocean, but more abstractly, it was how they coped with the improbability of the task,. This quote also helped them move forward without thinking too much about it.

In life, it takes a similar meaning.  Sometimes we are faced with huge and overwhelming setbacks, and there is no end in sight.  Remembering to “just keep swimming” can help us to take steps forward however possible, persevere in the smallest ways, and distract us from the reality of the circumstance. It also gives us hope that with enough time and energy, we can make it out the other end and overcome whatever is paining us.  It’s a mentality that has been adopted by so many to date, including Ellen, that can change lives.

So whatever you’re going through, know that there is an end to the madness, and just keep swimming until you get there.

Alright, picture this scenario. You’re in a parking lot and you just finished loading your groceries in the car. You, then, look to return your cart but you don’t see a convenient place to do so.  What do you do?

Okay, same situation, but this time there is a child in your cart.  Now, what do you do?

This scenario was analyzed in a scientific American article, revealing some pretty compelling psychological implications to the decisions we make in this situation. We are primarily motivated to act by two things. these are injunctive norms, which is how others will judge our behavior, and descriptive norms, which is how we use contextual clues to make decisions.

The article goes on to explain that there are 4 main responses. People who always return their cart, people who never return their cart, people who only return their cart when it’s close and convenient, and people who return their carts when they feel pressure from others around them.  

So, be an always returner. We should not let other factors dictate our actions. We should act with intention, and follow through on the principles that are important to us, even if it takes us 30 seconds out of our way.  Having this mentality in all areas of life, including in the grocery store parking lot, allows you to have more will power in other actions that have a larger influence on the state of your life. It serves as an opportunity to flex your will power muscles! Be someone with sound principles, ethical, moral and just, and hold yourself to those principles at all times!

This is a leadership tip from LinkInfluencer Founder Alex Pirouz, but before getting into that let’s talk about the qualities of a good leader. A good leader is someone who leads from the front, has a personal connection with their team, someone who can get the most out of their team, and someone who does what’s best for the group no matter what. That last part is what Alex’s thoughts are about how a leader must put their ego aside to do what’s best.

It’s a great lesson to learn. It applies to everyone, we are all leaders in our own ways, regardless of your position in a team. As a part of a team, it is essential that you do what is best for the group, knowing that personal success comes along with team success.

I spent my childhood by the beach in Southern California, and received an amazing opportunity to play collegiate soccer at the University of California, Davis. In my time there, I studied Neurobiology and became fascinated about understanding the way people think. I applied that interest in my first job as a medical device sales rep, gaining a unique skill-set with great experience, and now work at a startup as a marketer and strategist. I come from an extremely supportive and loving family, and am very driven by living a principled, joyful, and optimistic life.

Whew, I feel like I pulled the curtains on that one. But, see what I did there? In under 30 seconds, I managed to give you a much better picture about who I am, what I do, and why I do it. This is an important skill for many people to master.

We all have a story to tell, and as difficult as it may be for you to see, your story is truly unlike any other. And it is interesting! Maybe this is my Neurobiology and Psychology background speaking, but I am always fascinated to hear about how certain people become the way that they are.

But why tell a story? Well, it’s because people are more likely to follow, understand, and enjoy your message. Jonah Berger’s book, Contagious, talks about viral marketing tactics, and highlights “Stories” as the final component that incorporates all of the other marketing tactics. This is because stories are an extremely effective way of portraying emotional, practically valuable, and relevant information in an entertaining way.

When it comes to a quick personal pitch or story, you should obviously make it your own, but be sure to touch on the who, what, and why. With that framework, you will be able to concisely share information that will help others understand more about you, allowing them to better work with, relate to, and inspire you.

If you think about it, unless we take a nap, our days begin when we open our eyes in the morning and ends when we shut them at night. So, waking up really is the first thing that we do every single day, and in those first moments we have the opportunity to set the tone for the day.  What tone should we choose to set?

A day filled with gratitude, positivity, and contentment.

With the right mindset, starting every day with a fresh start could serve as all the motivation we need. It’s all about how we frame it.

First scenario, we had a bad day yesterday.  A fresh start will help us leave those challenges behind us and gives us hope that today will be better. We can realize that today is unrelated to yesterday and we can refocus our attention on the actionable parts of today.

Or, maybe we had a great day yesterday. And in this new day, we can try to duplicate our success. This pursuit motivates us all over again, as we have to start again from scratch, but this time with a template. Fortunately for us, positivity and positive momentum is much more likely to be carried into the next day with this mentality, and we should always leverage that if possible.

But In either of those cases, remember that a fresh start is a mentality, requiring that we believe things to be a certain way. Gratitude and appreciation as our first thought of the day sets the tone for the day and can be central to our daily success.

So, every day is a fresh start, wake up with a thankful heart.

There’s a common theme for a lot of us in our lives. When we are thinking about what we want to do, we have the best of intentions and set ambitious goals or schedules.  A funny thing happens though, the next morning when it is time to actually execute on that plan, we just don’t seem quite as motivated, and our intentions now feel like unreasonable hurdles we are placed in our own path. Why is it so easy to make plans for yourself at night, and so hard to actually put them into action the next morning? That is the golden question that I’d love to learn the answer to, but for now, I can only provide a makeshift solution.

Set your workout clothes out. As you’re going to bed, you set an earlier alarm than normal so that you can get a workout in, but when that alarm goes off the next morning your workout is the last thing you want to do?  It’s not just you, it’s everybody.

So, if you set out your clothes, a few things happen. First is seeing your clothes laid out on the floor reminds you of your intentions from the previous night, and might help you tap into that motivation you had. If that doesn’t work, then now you are left with two options. Either you leave your clothes where they were and step over them to go about your day, or you hang them back up. In either case, each time you interact with your clothes, you are reminded of your failure, and that feeling will provide extra motivation for the next time so you can get it done.

So, I’d suggest setting your clothes in front of the door to your room, or anywhere that you know is going to be the first place you walk to, because the sooner in your day you feel that disappointment, the more likely you are to change your mind and go workout.

This advice is near and dear to my heart because it came from a recent piece published by Brian Rashid. Rashid is a role model and mentor of mine who has dedicated his life’s work to bridging the opportunity gap between the Americas.  He talked about a very dangerous mindset that I want to address, because I think it exists in too many of us. It goes, “I will X when Y”.

This reminds me on an "If then" statement, which is essentially a cause and effect.  However, these statements are often too rigid to be functional. Similarly, "I will X when Y" is dangerous for the same reason.  For example, I will be happy or fulfilled or successful when I make a certain amount of money or buy my dream car or whatever. This phrasing is ineffective because it places too much emphasis on the actionable part of the expression and sets us up for failure.

This happens primarily for one reason. We have nothing to measure our effort on until we are finished.  So, Brian proposes that we refresh our motivation often by acknowledging small victories more, because they give us something to grab onto and remind us that we are headed the right direction.  He also suggests to break big projects into mini projects, so that we don’t get overwhelmed by the large task at hand, and can focus our effort on the immediate action item. Last, he says to remove our preconceptions. An exercise he does is he writes the script of how everything would go in an ideal world, and tears it up to physically acknowledge that things won’t go to plan, which then liberates him from that thinking and helps him to make the best decision given the context he is presented.

In summary, avoid the expression “I will X when Y” because it isn’t an accurate representation of your path and the steps needed to accomplish your goal.