A powerful concept to utilize more in our self-improvement, decision making, and to inform our own self-awareness is called “inversion”. When you invert something it means that you flip it on its head, put it upside down, or orient in the opposite arrangement.

Typically when we seek to solve problems in our lives or understand something we look at it directly. We want to figure out what our right amount of exercise is, what entails a healthy diet, how much time we want to spend on social media, and how many hours we consider a full day of work (among everything else).

While it’s helpful to have a clear track of thinking, sometimes we run into a dead end trying to define something that is really difficult to lock down.

This is where we can try inversion. Instead of focusing solely on what we want, we can get more informed by also thinking about what we don’t want.

How much exercise in a week is certainly not enough to keep up a healthy lifestyle? How much is too much when it comes to having dessert or fast food? How long is too long to spend on social media in a given day? When does it become a problem that you’re working beyond a certain time of day?

Invert the focus and you gain a new insight.

When it comes to establishing personal standards for ourselves, using inversion is very helpful. By thinking about what’s unacceptable to us we indirectly define what is acceptable. This gives us a clear expectation that we can hold ourselves accountable to, get feedback on, and navigate forward with.

So my recommendation to you right now is to go through a mini-thought experiment...

That one thing that you’re struggling most with, try inverting it to gain better insight into your standards. WIth the extra visibility you will either realize that you’re not as far off as you thought, or kick start motivation because you cannot deny that you need to be better.

Are you going to do it now? Great!

If not, do you need support getting into action? If so then this will do the trick!

I feel like the idea of will-power has gotten a bad reputation. Not only is will-power a bit misunderstood, but it’s a super power.

There are scientific studies that suggest will-power is 2x more likely to predict academic performance in kids than IQ! It’s not the smartest kids who succeed but those who have control over their choices and can delay gratification.

When we impose our conscious will on something it means that we shape what happens despite the circumstances of how we feel or what would be easiest. As you’d expect, this leads to healthier, more productive, more empowered choices and actions. To live our best life it’s very important that we do that, but the way we go about doing it needs a more diverse approach.

That’s because will-power is known to be unsustainable. Like a muscle, as you use it it fatigues. This explains why at the end of the day it’s harder to be disciplined than in the beginning of the day: Because you’ve used your reserves.

This is the very reason why we must use our will-power wisely - So that when we most need it, we have it.

So while it’s true that will-power cannot be your primary source for self-discipline, it plays a very important role in supplementing it. You first must build out systems that support consistency and intentional decision making. Things like accountability, goal setting, and routines help you to be disciplined without needing as much will-power. And given that these are often influencing us at an unconscious level it serves as a more sustainable source of discipline.

So how can will-power best contribute to you being the best version of yourself? There are two ways:

First is to use will-power to establish new systems. Use it to reach out for accountability despite resistance, outline your routine and its sequence of behaviors, and invest the time and energy now to build the system that will work for you later. It’s by getting yourself to design your environment that you can get exponential and recurring returns from your will-power.

The second instance where you can use will-power wisely are in the moments that need a little extra. Almost as if you’re reserving it for when you really need it. Getting out of bed on a tired morning, initiating your morning routine, exiting out of social media and putting your phone on Do Not Disturb. These micro-moments of discipline help you interrupt the pattern dn get into the systems you’ve designed that make taking the good, positive, healthy actions consistent and easier.

Protect your will-power. Honor it and use it in the occasions when you most need it. But that’s not constantly, it’s in very specific occasions that kick off your high-performance processes.

If you feel worn out at the end of a long day or like you’re losing the battle to make the healthy choices that you know are best for you, then this could really help. I’ve identified 9 Super Habits that work as systems behind the scenes to support your will-power and make you more disciplined in the most fundamental areas of your life. It only takes 15 minutes to implement all of them every day, and it will change your life!

Michael Jordan is one of the most competitive and prolific athletes of all time. He outworked, out hustled, and outsmarted his opponents on his way to setting records and winning NBA Championships.  What’s so fascinating is how someone like him, who achieved so much, barely allowed himself to look at the results he was earning.

Jordan was obsessed with the process. He was fiercely dedicated to his craft and wouldn’t let anything get in the way of him being the greatest of all time. One of his core beliefs that demonstrates this, that he brought into everything he does is having a deep faith that “the score takes care of itself”.

What does that mean?

It means that there’s this implicit connection between what we do and what we get out of it. It’s an acknowledgment of “cause and effect”, and how the result is out of our control but we can influence it by controlling what we put in. And not wanting to leave the result up to chance, Jordan was relentless in his preparation and approach to the game.

You’d think that one of the best scorers in history would be concerned with the score. It almost sounds like an apathetic approach to it. Michael is one of the fiercest competitors in history, so it’s not to say that he didn’t care about the score (because he very much did). If anything it reinforces his unbelievable commitment to doing the work and dedicating himself to what was in his control, which was his work ethic and development.

Not surprisingly, another basketball icon, UCLA coach John Wooden, had a similar philosophy. His definition of success is “having peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.”

Wooden says it with a bit of a different intention, suggesting a healthy disconnection from the end-result and a strict prioritization of preparation.

We’re in a world that values results. What’s the weight on the scale? How much business did you bring in? And results are important because they reflect our personal realities. But those are just the lagging indicators of the work that actually fuels the process, which is the work.

I’m willing to bet that both Michael Jordan and John Wooden were more in tune with the daily actions they needed to take to meet the requirements of championship worthy performance.

So if you want something really badly in your life, take a note from some of the most successful and accomplished men in basketball. Think about what you could do on a daily basis, as part of your core process to attain it, rather than be fixated on the thing itself. Your energy and attention isn’t as valuable there.

For most of us our best life doesn’t involve treating our life like Micahel Jordan treated his. But his success leaves clues, and we’d benefit from paying attention to it.

I’m blessed to know some really good leaders in my life, and in observing their behavior I’ve noticed an odd paradox. Sometimes the best way to lead is by being the first to go, and sometimes it’s by being the last to go.

At the foundation of this concept is that good leaders are of service. They’re willing to inconvenience themselves to do what’s required to serve those they lead.

On one hand, Mike Sherbakov is one of my best friends and best leaders that I know. Multiple times a year for the last decade he has organized social impact trips to build houses in Mexico. He’s the one standing alone at the very beginning of the fundraising process, making a bold statement and inviting people to join him. Few people have the courage to organize their own build but he does it time and again.

Then, once in Mexico and after the first day of grueling sun and hard work, we eat at an authentic taco restaurant. Every time Mike patiently helps everyone make sure that they’ve put in their order, and that they get their food, before he worries about himself. He’s always the last one to eat after everyone else has already been fed.

Another great leader I know is Alex Sheen, the founder of the nonprofit “because I said I would”. As he travels for his speaking engagements he organizes meetups so that he can connect with community members. There are times when he makes a reservation, shows up to the table first, and only a few of the people who he expected to come show up.

Then the next day after he delivers a speech to a school or business, he’s there to greet every last person that wants to meet him. He listens patiently to every story they have to share and gives them the space to receive his support.

And although there are many more that come to mind, the last great leader I want to highlight is my wife Irene. She has an incredible way of opening up with others and going first in being vulnerable. This then invites her friends (and sometimes strangers) to open up as well and talk about things they usually don’t.

At the same time, if someone is going through a tough time or invites her to be at something meaningful to them, she makes a huge effort to show up and is among the last to leave. It’s her way of being of service to the people she cares about, and it’s inspiring.

All that to say, there’s no one right thing to do as a leader. But there is a right way to lead, and that’s to be of service in whatever way the moment requires.

For today’s positivity quote I wanted to feature two of the most enriching things we can do in our lives, and the distinction between them so we can make sure we’re prioritizing both.

The quote is, “Playing is different than having fun.”

We all have a pretty good idea around what it means to have fun. It means that we do fun things - go to shows, organize events, have enjoyable hobbies, play games, experiment with a new recipe, travel and experience new things, it’s a long list...

Having fun is the output of doing fun things, and the world would certainly be a better place if we all had a little more fun.

That’s not to say that it’s easy to have fun… Prioritizing the time to do fun things amidst life’s responsibilities is a real challenge and it’s one of the first things to be deprioritized.

But "playing is different than having fun".

Playing is not the outcome you get at the end, it’s the energy you put into what you do. When we play we choose to see more intrigue, mystery, and wonder in everything. You do not need to do something to play, but rather you do something a certain way that makes it play.

What happens then is that choosing to play creates more fun because it transforms anything into an opportunity to have fun.

Take children for example. They use their imagination and can turn any moment into a moment of play. A random object becomes a fake phone to have a conversation. The asphalt becomes lava that they must navigate forward. Children have the skill of creating playful moments out of nothing.

As adults, the way we play has changed. It’s a more sophisticated form of imagination and creativity where we can be cheeky in conversation, animated as we do mundane tasks, and make games out of random things. We choose to be playful and in doing so, infuse more fun in what’s already happening.

So do both. Plan fun things, but also create more fun moments through play. It shouldn’t be an afterthought, we’re at our best when we’re being attracted by the enthusiasm of life!

I find that growth-oriented people who want to discover the very edges of their potential have a recurring problem…

They don’t know what to do next!

They aren’t clear on the direction of their growth, the most impactful thing they could be doing to improve themselves, or the next steps they need to take to realize their potential.

This is where I want to highlight the two directions that are always available to us: To solve the problems we’re facing in our lives or to access new possibilities.

This mirrors the two great motivational forces we have in life, which are the pursuit of pleasure and the avoidance of pain. And as long as we’re thinking through this lens we’ll always have an idea for what we can improve next.

First let’s talk about problems. Problems are results that we aren’t completely happy with. It could be that we missed the mark altogether, or that there were issues in our process for achieving the desired result. In either case, a problem highlights that we could have done things better, and with that acknowledgment comes an opportunity for improvement.

Then we can talk about possibilities. Rather than thinking about what didn’t produce good results, we can think about what the next level of result we could attain is. This gets us thinking more creatively and more ambitiously as we build upon the foundation we’ve already established.

But if I’m being honest, a possibility is just a different type of problem. Rather than it being a problem of insufficiency, it’s a problem of missing out on the next tier of result that is yet to be.

Let's use diet as an example to highlight the difference: A problem in our diet could be that we aren’t meeting the standard we’ve set for ourselves around how healthy our meals should be. We can solve this problem by getting rid of unhealthy snacks, finding a few new healthy recipes, or creating a new grocery shopping list system to make sure you have access to healthy ingredients.

Now let’s say that you’re happy with your diet, that you’re meeting your current standard. This means that the opportunity for improvement is to think about to raise your standard for my diet, and understand what a healthier diet would even look like.

This takes you into the creative brainstorm of what’s possible for you in your healt - How a vegan diet might support you, what supplements you could take to improve digestion, or whatever it might be. The problem isn’t one of insufficiency and not meeting expectations, but rather not maximizing the opportunity that is your personal nutrition.

If you’re falling short of the results you desire, that’s a direct problem. If you’re looking to elevate the results you’re getting to something even better, that’s an indirect problem in the form of a possibility. Identify both in your life and you’ll always have something to pursue in the name of becoming the best version of yourself.

The actionable element of this is to become more aware of the problems and possibilities you have in your life. So let’s create that consciousness right now:

What’s one problem you’re experiencing in your health, work productivity, or mindset… And what’s one possibility you have in those same areas to elevate beyond your current results?

When I went to college I received a degree in neurobiology and I remember during my studies, there was a massive finding in the field that reshaped our understanding about rewards.

Studies found that the biggest dopamine spike we experience isn’t in receiving the reward itself, but in anticipation of it.

Let’s connect this to James Clear’s ‘Habit Loop’ that he shares in “Atomic Habits” - The 4 steps of a habit are the cure, craving, routine, and reward.

Basically what this finding proved is that the biggest dopamine spike occurs during the craving step, when the idea for the behavior was planted in your mind, rather than during the reward step after the behavior has been completed.

Biologically this does something really vital - It creates motivation for the action. Because we have this enriched positive state that happens before the routine, we’re more prone to follow through on the routine to claim the reward (even though the benefit of the reward is less significant than the craving).

While this finding has direct impacts on the ways that we experience reward, I think it also has implications in the way that we experience pain.

Have you ever felt completely resistant to getting an early morning workout in, but then once you’re there you realize it’s not that bad?

Or have you ever avoided a certain task that has been weighing on your mind, like taxes, and then once you get into it it’s not as confusing or hard as you thought it would be?

Those are examples of how we actually feel more pain in anticipation of the action rather than in doing the action itself, and why the biggest battle we fight is just to get started.

Now what can we do with this information?

First we can use it as awareness. If we feel a resistance to doing something, we can reason with ourselves that it won’t feel so painful once we get started. This gives us the awareness we need to will ourselves forward.

But more importantly, it highlights the difficulty of converting intention into action. It explains why you can big plans for who you’re going to be and what you’re going to do when you go to bed, and not show up for it the next day as it all goes out the window.

My mission statement is to help convert human intention into action. And now, knowing that we experience more pain in anticipation of doing something, we can use that as a way to help us understand our intentions and ultimately, what we want.

In case you didn’t know, the way I support people in that mission is to help them design the systems, mindsets, and procedures to follow through on their best intentions with real and tangible action.

That’s why I put together a video course about the 9 Super Habits - to help you actually become the healthy, productive, and disciplined person you know you’re capable of being. Want to change your life and change the world?

Start here!

The one person we can never get away from in life is ourselves. We are constantly in our heads having an internal conversation of thoughts that reflects our perception, needs, beliefs, and desires.

But sometimes those thoughts aren’t helpful.

It’s the voice on your shoulder criticizing you telling you that you’re not good enough. It’s a reinforcing script that suggests one failure is a statement of your poor character rather than an isolated moment of learning. It could even surface thoughts that are offensive and scandalous, things that you’d never take action on but you wonder why they came to mind in the first place.

But here’s something that I heard from Ed Mylett that has taken me a while to process: “You don’t need to believe every thought that you think.”

When we’re born, we are a blank slate. As we develop we learn different lessons, have different cultures and norms imprinted on us, and install a set of beliefs that become the filter our daily thoughts run through.

All of this to say - Thoughts of self-criticism, unworthiness, or offensiveness do not come from you. They come from the conditioning you were exposed to.

It’s within our power to challenge our thoughts, question our beliefs, and reroute our internal dialogue to something else that serves us. Rather than being at the mercy of these unconscious thought patterns we can choose to have more constructive thoughts through consciousness.

And that requires that we interrupt the pattern.

Have a self-defeating or self-critical thought about how you gave a bad presentation? Shift that to a thought of being proud you stepped up to the opportunity, and that your presentations will get better.

Feeling triggered by something that a loved one does and notice yourself thinking poorly of them? Change your line of thinking to be more empathetic, and choose to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Just because you’re thinking something does not make it true to you. There are layers of bias and years of conditioning that influence the thoughts we have. Being mindful of that will help you be more in control of the thoughts you think and therefore, impact the emotions you feel, the actions you take, and the results you get.