I want to go back to this weekend and a point that really stood out to me in our third Self Improvement Sit Down with Dan Janetos. As a quick reminder, Dan is an outrageously successful chef, a Guinness world record holder, and an effective entrepreneur in so many different areas. After being on the side of fame and fortune, Dan realized life is about so much more than that. 

"You got to stop and you have to smell the roses, because if you get from zero to billionaire and you have not enjoyed the journey then you missed all of it. There is this back and forth with I want to be rich, I want to be rich, I want to do all of these things, but then you get to rich and fame and you are just exhausted and you are just depressed. Now you are like, how did this happen? All of these wealthy guys are saying it is not about the money, and you are like, how can you say that? Well, it is about the money truthfully. At the end of the day, when your team works hard for you, you thank them and you fell that, because that is the happiness at the end of the day that you deserve".

Happiness takes so many forms, and no matter how much money you have or what reputation or status you carry, we all share the same basic human needs.  And these needs are achievable outside of wealth and outside of status. Enjoy the company of others, be grateful for what you have, and don’t let ambition spoil your satisfaction.

FThis message comes from Gina B, our registered dietician and human nutrition expert. She is a huge advocate for developing a good foundation before worrying about what is on your plate.

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3 deep breaths to build that mind-body connection.  It helps you to slow down, realize what you need, and enjoy the experience.

My mom sent over a quote that really stood out to me not too long ago. The message reminded me to change my approach about Mondays. Instead of giving in to the Monday blues, we can greet the new week with open arms and a fresh mindset. 

The quote is from SC Lourie that states, “We start the week off all wrong. We start the week off thinking of all the things we need to get done, the projects that need completing, the duties that need fulfilling and then we wonder why we are so tired and uninspired by the end of the week. Try something else this time. Before you write down your things to do list, put together a special people to see list and a beautiful moments to have list.  And make your week first in your heart about the people you want to be with, the moments you want to have, the love that you want to give yourself.  Because, darling, at the end of our lives, the tasks we generally got done won’t mean anything at all. It will be about who we are, who we have close by, and the beautiful moments we allowed ourselves to experience. And it should be like that now. Not just at the end, but here, now, as well.  That’s how we minimize our regrets. That’s how we savour being alive".

I don’t know if there’s much more I can say than that. I guess at the core of it, just make time for the people who matter, because that’s what counts.

If you’ve ever traveled out of the country, or even just outside of your hometown and comfort zone, you’ve probably gotten a feel for the exhilaration of seeing new places. Well, that’s exactly what happened to Chelsey Evans, a travel blogger and the founder of MyExploreWithMe. She takes a practical approach to travel, knowing that it takes money to make it happen. But she has a solution!

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Live life to the fullest and enjoy the way you spend your time. It’s not unreasonable to believe that we all deserve happiness in our lives.  In fact, I think it’s a human right.

Let’s try something. let’s reverse the order of the clauses. Make the days count, don’t count the days. Did that change the meaning at all for you?  It sounds like more of a challenge, like an approach to life rather than a suggestion.  It seems more actionable to, like it is a tangible concept that can be pursued rather than an abstract thought.

Why does that work? It’s because with the reverse order we are no longer starting the quote with a negative statement. Our minds get defensive when we are introduced to something negative, and the way we perceive that message shifts to accommodate for being defensive.   

Well, that’s where positivity co In life. In life, we are surrounded by similar but more subtle examples of this. We can choose to default to negativity or we can elect to default to positivity. The events and circumstances around us might be out of our control, but the way we perceive those events is not. We can see things in a positive light or go on living on defense.

So, as great as the quote we all know and love is, I prefer to change the order to, "make the days count, don’t count the days".

I got extremely lucky in how I learned this lesson, and I wanted to share it with you. Recently, I was at an amazing event where we brainstormed as a group the ways we could give back to the community, with one of those ideas being put into action at the end of the event. So, a few finalists got to present their programs to the group, and when I was watching the presentations I noticed something interesting. Each person in their pitch spoke with conviction, like they had already won the competition.

They were saying things like, “we are going to implement a mentorship program”, or “we will work with veterans”. And the way they spoke left zero room for doubt. It made for a persuasive and compelling argument, which demanded confidence and respect.

If I were in that position I would have said something like “if selected, we would try to implement a mentorship program”, or “we’re gonna see if we can work with veterans”.  If I’m being honest, I’d do that to put distance between the program and myself, just to protect myself from failure if it doesn’t get selected. But, the more I think of it, the more I realize that speaking like that would rule myself out before I even gave it a chance. My pitch would be over before I started because I didn’t fully believe in it. And that’s something the audience would recognize.

So, what can we do to speak with more conviction? For one, it’s about controlling our vocabulary. Some of us have a tendency to use weakened vocabulary so that our message is more likely to be received. So, avoid saying things like, "I just thought that"or “I mean” because it does present your message with conviction.  And then second - just believe in yourself! If you truly believe in what you are speaking about, it will come off as much more confident and assured. Those are two takeaways that I definitely want to start working on, because after hearing the power behind these presentations, I want to give it a try for myself!

The individual who encouraged me to seriously pursue personal development is Darren Hardy. He believes that consistency in positive choice is a foundation that will create massive change down the road, which has become a pillar in my life, and his challenge to define success has been equally influential. In an interview Darren shared a bit about something he believed lives at the cornerstone of his success, which is to fail quickly and massively. I’m still trying to understand exactly what I think about this concept, so I want to pass it off to you.

It goes to show that there is value in the negative as long as you know what to do with it!

A while back, I got up in the morning and got in the car to go to work, only to find that there was a crack in my windshield. It was disappointing of course, but it was small, so I didn’t think much of it. Then as time passed, the crack continued to creep further and further across my windshield until it got to a point where repairing it was unavoidable. So, I booked an appointment to get it fixed at the dealer.  

That was not the right decision. Not only was it much more expensive than it needed to be, but the dealership doesn’t accept insurance, and I got jerked around by the staff trying to get a ride, which made me late for work. It was frustrating and I was getting upset.

But, then I decided to take ownership of the situation. It was my fault that I let the car get to this point, and I could have managed the crack better before it required a full windshield repair. I could have been more proactive about reaching out to insurance earlier to understand how to best handle the situation, but I didn’t. Also, I have so many knowledgeable friends and family who could have guided me through the process of what I should have done, but I didn’t ask anyone which is my fault also. I realized that my frustration and emotion could have been avoided had I done something differently.  

After taking ownership, I was able to take a position of gratitude. How lucky I was to have a car, and for this repair to be the only thing I needed. There is so much worse out there and I tried to keep that in perspective.  The lessons I learned is don’t procrastinate when it comes to things you don’t know much about, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. I’ll take those with me for years to come