Self Improvement Daily Podcast

When we give thanks, or express gratitude, we do so expecting nothing in return. It’s a way of appreciating everything you have, nothing more, and being at peace with that. That’s why it is so fascinating to me that in this state of giving thanks, that’s when you find something new!

Give thanks for a little, and you will find a lot.  

To add, the quote in itself has contrast. That‘s because a little thanks does go a long, long way! By expressing gratitude in small amounts, you train your brain to see more gratitude in the future. With that training your level of gratitude grows beyond measure! This is the exact concept in the B.A.G. technique I shared earlier in the week. Count your blessings. More blessings are on the way!

When taking a position of gratitude, you reflect on the positive things in your life. Even if the road to get where you are today was bumpy and misguided, it still led you exactly where you’re meant to be, and that’s something worth being grateful for!

Have you tired brushing your teeth with your opposite hand?

I must preface, the science is inconclusive about the neurological benefits of this. Some studies state, is that different areas of our brain are active when engaging in a unique action. This then plays into our brain’s natural tendency to accommodate our bodies demand by changing its wiring or firing patterns. If you’re familiar with this theory, the buzzword here is neuroplasticity, and it is responsible in part for learning. The thought is that putting the brain in a neuroplastic state by brushing your teeth with the wrong hand then creates an environment for other learning to occur.

If you choose not to believe that, which I wouldn’t blame you for, then let’s think about the indirect consequences of the action.  First is discipline. Most of us brush our teeth two or more times a day, which means we have two or more opportunities to use the opposite hand. If we use the opposite hand, we are testing our willpower to stick to our commitment, which, if you ever tried it, you know how hard it is to brush with the wrong hand. Then growing on that, if you do develop the habit and commit to it, you quickly learn how possible improvement is. Having that tangible example in front of you might encourage you to have more patience in other areas.

So yes, Self Improvement Daily is in fact telling you to try brushing your teeth with your opposite hand. It’s just one small thing that could be the difference you are looking for. And in true Self Improvement Daily spirit, if it’s not for you then ditch it! We are all very different and we should celebrate that.

As humans, we sometimes focus on a certain component of our behavior so much that we don’t realize the other ways that behavior manifests in other areas.  We have this entitlement about a decision we made, or a good deed that we did, and we feel like we get a hall pass on something else. This social phenomenon is called “moral licensing”.  Let’s let Nir Eyal, a Stanford MBA, habit expert, and author of the incredible book “Hooked” break it down for us.

I feel like the examples Nir shared did a great job of illustrating the point, and now that we are aware of moral licensing, we can be more careful about not letting it get the best of us.  Interestingly, we can apply the same reasoning with progress. Moral licensing also makes it more acceptable to take a break when we have already accomplished a lot. In both cases, it is important to view our wins as positive, but not as an excuse to have our performance suffer in another area.

Do you have personal decision making framework? How do you reason between the option you know is good for you, and the option that you want? For most of us, it is a very conscious process to suppress the urge to indulge in pleasure. Let’s think about how that decision relates to our overall happiness. Lucia Giovannini, an Italian spiritual teacher, transformational coach, and now best-selling author for the book “A Whole New Life”, shares her relationship with pleasure and happiness.

“How to stop being driven by pleasure and instead go towards happiness. There are so many people who have a house, a family, a job and yet are deeply frustrated, dissatisfied. There was a period in my life where I was feeling like that. I think the problem is that in our society we tend to confuse pleasure with happiness.  Real happiness emerges when what we do makes our lives and the world around  us better.  Happiness is found by doing the right things, by making investments that allow us to accumulate emotional and mental wealth helping us to grow, to develop quality. Pleasure has other characteristics, it is a short term reward. When we taste pleasure we are consuming something.  We come across this kind of choice every day, even in the simplest of things. When we get home from work, do we invest our time in reading a stimulating book, in volunteering, or do we sink in front of the TV? In the long run, which choice will give the most reward?”

To summarize, be conscious of your small choices because they have downstream effects. Make a habit of making choices that lead you to happiness.

Let's hear from the perspective of a thought leader in the space, world renowned author and public speaker Simon Sinek. Sinek is best known for his famous “Start with Why” Ted Talk, Simon is known for being and idealist with a refreshing practicality. Simon mentions why he choose to be an optimist in his life.

Simon captures the decision we all have to see positivity and optimism in our lives. Positivity provides the framework for good things to happen in our lives, and as Simon mentioned, to create things that live beyond our lives.

Okay I’m going to ask you a question. The question is, What do you enjoy doing?

Your default answer might have been something like “I work out” or “I genuinely enjoy my personal projects”, but those are not acceptable answers, and here is why. We live in a society that emphasizes productivity and efficiency, and we reason that what is productive is what also brings us joy. I’m guiltier than anyone about this, but I want us to set that aside and focus on the raw version of this. What do we genuinely do for ourselves? Can you even think of the last time you did something like that?

Well, lets talk about do something for yourself. The first step to doing something for yourself is figuring out what that is. If you have the time, take yourself through a little brainstorm. What are your hobbies? When are you happiest? What do you wish you could make time for? Do some soul searching on not only what brings you joy, but why that brings you joy.

Whether it’s watching Netflix reruns of your favorite TV show, playing with your dog, or taking a long shower, give yourself that moment to fuel your mind and body with exactly what it wants to do. It will be the refreshing push you needed to get the most out of everything else you’ve got going on. We can’t neglect to take care of ourselves. Prioritizing some personal time is an important part of the equation.

We all live our own lives, in our own ways, gathering our own impressions and perspectives. This means that we all develop an understanding that is limited to our own lens. We are often blind to the way that things are when they don’t align with what we see. It’s a classic, “You don’t know what you don’t know", scenario.  

The same happens professionally. We may think we are good at something, and that we are meeting expectations, when in reality we may not be performing as well as we thought. Our limited scope doesn’t always paint the full picture, and it is important to acknowledge that. These areas are called blind spots, which are areas where we have an inability to recognize where we are deficient. Fortunately for us, though, there are ways to overcome our blind spots.

Try using a group think approach. This is why working in a team can be so effective. Instead of relying and moving forward with your own impressions, convinced they are correct, you can hear other people’s impressions and realize that your decision making may be neglecting key factors.  For this to be effective, everyone in the group must have an open mind and realize that the same information may be interpreted a number of ways. Then reconvene and find a compromise among everyone’s insights likely leads to the most effective decision.

For matters that affect you as an individual, it is very similar. Have people in your network that challenge your insights because their influence will help you gain clarity to what exists in your blind spots. You then take it from there, knowing what you didn’t before. You can begin filling in the gaps in your skill-set or your thought processes.

Patience! It is a pivotal component to success that doesn’t get enough attention. I can’t say this any better than CEO of the Superfan Company and Forbes 30 under 30 Kim Kaupe.

It’s good to set ambitious goals and have lofty expectations for yourself and your achievements, but understand that it is not going to happen over night. Most things in life require a whole lot of hard work, dedication, and time. Patience really is a virtue. Embrace it as a tool that can help you get the most out of whatever you are passionate about.