If you want to change the quality of your life you need to change the quality of the questions you ask yourself. Your thinking is simply the process of asking and answering questions to yourself, and when you ask better questions, you live a better life. With this core understanding, we can introduce an intervention that gives you a real way to stop your mind from spiraling into negative self-talk and instead find ways to empower you and support you in a constructive way.

The negative self-talk and limiting beliefs come as a response to the questions you’re unconsciously asking yourself. Something happens and you start playing the ‘what if’ game… What if I run out of money? What if I fail? What if I make a fool of myself? What if I hurt myself or someone else? This is called “What-If Down” and it represents all of the questions you ask yourself that make you consider worst case scenarios. This is the brains natural process, by the way, because the brain’s core objective is to keep you safe, and pointing out the negative is a survival mechanism.

But instead, how about you choose the script you want to play in your head. Just like you unconsciously go through a line of negative self-questioning, you can prompt yourself to engage in a line of positive self-questioning. This is called “What-If Up”, and the questions you’d ask yourself are: What if this works out how I hope it would? What if I beat expectations? What if this is exactly where I’m supposed to be? These positive questions cause you to reflect in positive ways and generate a more empowering narrative. This causes you to feel more positive emotions, which then leads you to take positive actions, that lead to positive results.

The “What-If Up” approach plays in even seemingly negative scenarios. Let’s say that you notice yourself falling behind on a goal, you can ask yourself more supportive questions. What if I made up a ton of ground today on my goal? You’d be inspired to find ways to bridge the gap. What if I asked for help to achieve this goal? You start to think about who you might reach out to. What if I comeback and succeed? You start getting in the energy of achievement and it will motivate you. All of this helps you arrive in the emotional state that will carry you to take action toward your goal!

Another way of putting it - You get what you focus on. Start using “What-If Up” questioning to focus on the positive elements and create positive change in your life.

Now you have an extra tool in your tool belt to take control of your life. If you want to really transform your life, and become more disciplined than ever so that you can pursue your dreams with confidence and self-belief, check out the new program I put together called The Better Habits Playbook. Do it right now before you forget and miss this opportunity to change your life.

I’m sure you're familiar with the iconic Jiminy Cricket song “When you wish upon a star”. It has inspired generations of people, but I doubt many people slowed down to really process the meaning in the message. Let me read the song write now as a poem:

"When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are. Anything your heart desires will come to you. If your heart is in your dream, no request is too extreme. When you wish upon a star as dreamers do. Fate is kind she brings to those to love the sweet fulfillment of their secret longing. Like a bolt out of the blue, fate steps in and sees you through. When you wish upon a star your dreams come true."

The lyrics feature the power of fate. It suggests that anything you authentically believe and want for yourself can be yours. Fate does not discriminate or play favorites, it simply listens to those with the strongest desires and it gets to work on delivering for them. No dream is too big to have. Fate wouldn’t be so cruel to give you a dream you weren’t capable of achieving. But it takes courage to voice what you want, and resilience to stay committed to your dreams even when you don’t see immediate evidence that you’re making progress.

Now let’s add the layer of what role Jiminy Cricket plays in the movie Pinocchio. He is the conscience. He is a pure connection to source, spirit, and abundance. We all have a Jiminy Cricket within us, but we also have a negative voice in our head that creates self-doubt and insecurity. 

These voices are constantly at battle against each other, just like the Cherokee legend of the two wolves - One wolf is evil - full of anger, lies, guilt, and resentment. The other wolf is good - full of joy, peace, love, and hope. The wolf that wins is the one you feed. 

Choose to believe in your dreams, be inspired by your potential, and to feed the voice that serves you. “When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are. Anything your heart desires will come to you.”

Have you been feeling stuck for a while and need a small-win that ignites your self-confidence and inspires you to dream bigger? Start becoming the best version of yourself with the Better Habits Playbook.  

On your personal development journey, you need to be sure you have the right foundation in place. Discover the 7 Fundamentals To Self Improvement and instantly accelerate your growth! (Who knows what you might be overlooking and how it’s holding you back…)

If you’re in the US or Canada, text me at 949-799-0788 and I’ll send you daily text messages that help you grow and discover yourself every day.

Are you the type of person that fearlessly steps into new things, or are you someone who is more careful about what you get involved in? If you identify more with the latter, you’re going to want to pay extra attention to this. If you want to really start changing your life, you’re going to need to act before you’re ready.

I’m not suggesting that you act recklessly, or without intentionality. In fact this is a more calculated and intentional approach. This is because it puts things in action. You cannot wait for things to be perfect or ready because either the day will never come or you will have waited too long and put yourself too far behind. 

The reality is, the only way to truly put finishing touches on something, and make those final tweaks, is to step into the environment and see how it does. You will never get things completely right the first time, so why is that the expectation? What’s more valuable is taking action, getting started, and integrating the feedback you receive to improve your process.

The most successful people in the world take action with the least amount of knowledge. Do you know why? Because they understand how this works, and they’re willing to expose themselves to failure or disappointment if it means that they’ll accelerate their progress.

So maybe that’s what it is for you. Maybe you want things to be perfect before taking action because you’re afraid of what it says about you if you fail. Because it will highlight how you’re not smart enough or good enough. But that can all be embraced with an intention. Instead of being so attached to the outcome, embrace a learner's mindset and see how you can improve things. It changes the meaning of failure. And trust me, you’ll start to figure it out once you get going, so don’t let fear get in the way of you even having a chance to succeed.

So think about this - What do you want to do but you don’t feel ready for it? Hopefully by now you understand the only way to get ready is to get started.

Have you been feeling stuck for a while and need a small-win that ignites your self-confidence and inspires you to dream bigger? Start becoming the best version of yourself with the Better Habits Playbook.  

On your personal development journey, you need to be sure you have the right foundation in place. Discover the 7 Fundamentals To Self Improvement and instantly accelerate your growth! (Who knows what you might be overlooking and how it’s holding you back…)

If you’re in the US or Canada, text me at 949-799-0788 and I’ll send you daily text messages that help you grow and discover yourself every day.

Ready for me to share one of the most important things for you to understand about yourself? You already are who you need to be. You already have everything you’ll ever need inside of you to create and achieve everything you’ve ever wanted. Now you might be asking yourself “If I already am who I need to be, then why am I not where I want to be?” Great question - let’s dive into answering it.

As a living, breathing human being, you are already connected to infinite power. Call it source, the universe, or God, your existence is a representation of the miracles you are capable of. Your nature comes from absolute abundance, and you are simply an extension of the divine. This means that you already possess all of the qualities, traits, and abilities you’ll ever need. You are a creator who is literally designing the future based on the thoughts and ideas you have. Tell me that’s not powerful… This is how you already are who you need to be, because you have this power.

The problem is, it’s pretty obvious we don’t live with full abundance. We have financial hardship, and our ego and biases get in the way from us living the way we want sometimes. Our lives are not perfect. Even though we’re capable of so, so much, it’s often not reflected in our lives. That’s the truth and the human experience. However this isn’t a result of not being capable, it’s more a product of circumstance. 

Our connection to source or God or the universe is undeniable, but the challenge is how clear that connection is. You’ve probably heard the expression “I’m just getting in my own way.” That is literally you creating resistance and friction to having a pure connection to source. The natural flow of how things are meant to go is being inhibited and restricted by circumstance. So if that’s the case, our mission is not to strengthen our connection, that’s innate within us. Instead it’s to remove the obstacles that prevent us from having a clearer connection.

So how do you clear that signal and live a more abundant life? You become more aware of the obstacles and bottlenecks. You need to remove the things that are getting in the way. Those things are inherently human - The needs of the ego, our limited perception of reality, and the ways we’re trying to create certain results rather than have faith that the right things will happen in the right ways.

This is complex but I want to help you get started in a small way - How do you feel like you’re getting in your own way?

Have you been feeling stuck for a while and need a small-win that ignites your self-confidence and inspires you to dream bigger? Start becoming the best version of yourself with the Better Habits Playbook.  

On your personal development journey, you need to be sure you have the right foundation in place. Discover the 7 Fundamentals To Self Improvement and instantly accelerate your growth! (Who knows what you might be overlooking and how it’s holding you back…)

If you’re in the US or Canada, text me at 949-799-0788 and I’ll send you daily text messages that help you grow and discover yourself every day.

Something that is the cause of a lot of misunderstanding and disappointment is not meeting expectations. As humans we have wired into us a desire to be accepted by others. It’s normal, we’re social creatures and this adds a lot of enrichment to the quality of our lives. But it also can be a source of pain.

For that reason expectations are often thought of as a bad thing. If we didn’t have expectations then we wouldn’t fall short of them and create social confrontation because of it. But expectations are an incredible influence and motivator to go beyond what is standard. Expectations help provide clarity about what you’re hoping to accomplish, how well you’re hoping to perform, and it pulls you to meet the task at that level.

However, that’s when you are living by fair expectations that you decide for yourself. So with that in mind I want to share three examples of how your expectations can be biased, or catering to something else that doesn’t originate authentically inside of you.

The first example is expectations imposed by others. This is someone projecting their belief system, values, and choices onto you. It could come from a place of love or it could be a subconscious result of insecurity, but in either case it comes through their lens on the world. Their perspective is not your perspective, and those expectations deserve to be questioned.

Another form of expectation is an outcome. The vast majority of outcomes are out of your control, and if you get your sense of self too wrapped up in something that you can’t control, then you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. That’s where it’s important to be process-oriented and to celebrate the things you’re doing, the ways you’ve learned to improve your process, rather than the end result.

And then last is how expectations change with accomplishment. In fact, expectations are the shadows of accomplishment. Our culture pushes a narrative that you constantly should be striving for more. When you succeed and you prove you’re capable of more, then the bar gets raised. This is a good thing if it’s what you want, but it’s a bad thing if it forces you to compromise other priorities in order to live up to new expectations.

So as with everything, be intentional. Determine what expectations are appropriate for your life - Who you want to be, what you want to accomplish, where you’re headed. But still use them as a tool as they can become an incredible North Star for you as you build the life you desire.

If you know you’re capable of more in your life, and you want to unlock another level of productivity and fulfillment but you don’t know where to get started, check out the new program I put together for you called the Better Habits Playbook. If you think my insights have been helpful to you, this program is 10x!

Learn more about the Better Habits Playbook here.

In life today we are asked for more than ever. More things to do, more plans to make, more people to appease, more books to read. More. There is no shortage of ways to fill your time and if you aren’t intentional about where you’re investing your time, then someone else will decide for you.

A piece of advice I’m sure you’ve heard before is to “say no more often”. That’s because when you say “yes”, you’re actually implicitly saying “no” to 10 other things that you might prefer to do. But saying “no” is not easy, many people struggle with it because of the social pressure and perceived confrontation it creates. But it’s incredibly important for you to be able to enforce your own boundaries.

In Greg McKeown’s pioneering book “Essentialism”, he argues that we can do more by doing less. This is because our efforts aren’t being split in so many ways, and therefore we can make more progress when we commit to fewer tasks. But he knows this is easier said than done, so in his book he outlines a few ways to say “no” more gracefully.

First is to delay. Instead of saying "no" outright, you can say “let me check my calendar and I’ll get back to you.” This creates more space for you in a moment where you feel like you’re being pressed for a decision. You always have the right to be intentional with your commitments.

Or if someone asks a favor from you, you can communicate your boundaries by saying ”You are welcome to X, I am willing to Y.” Like if someone asks for a ride you can say, “You are welcome to borrow my car, I am willing to coordinate with you to give you the keys.”

And last, you can make an alternative suggestion. You can refer to someone else who might be more capable to help, or suggest a different version of the request that you want to say “yes” to. As in when someone asks for a phone call, you can say “How about next week?” or “Could we try seeing if we could handle this over email first?”

When you get better at saying “no”, and do so in a respectful and tasteful way, you start really making your priorities a priority, and you’ll feel proud of yourself for how you’re making positive choices that serve you.

To apply this right now, let me give you this challenge. The next time someone asks something of you that you’re not prepared to do, commit to saying a version of “no” and see what happens.

On your personal development journey, you need to be sure you have the right foundation in place. Discover the 7 Fundamentals To Self Improvement and instantly accelerate your growth! (Who knows what you might be overlooking and how it’s holding you back…)

If you’re in the US or Canada, text me at 949-799-0788 and I’ll send you daily text messages that help you grow and discover yourself every day.

Everyday in our personal development we’re chasing something. There’s a force and urge that pushes us along. It’s pretty unconventional when you think about it, and I’m wondering if you’ve ever been able to place where that desire comes from.

It’s easier to keep it low key, yet we stretch ourselves in ways that challenge us. It’s more comfortable to keep things the same, but we choose to pursue change and the unpredictability that comes with it. I believe there’s something inside of us that is desperate to see who we were capable of becoming. It’s innate within us to explore self-mastery and work toward self-actualization. Dave Meltzer defines this invisible force by saying “We must be what we can be.” It’s just wired into us, and while we all approach this same force from unique angles (which are drawn from our own unique experiences), at the end of the day it’s just a different skin to the same core factors.

But within this pursuit, sometimes life gets in the way. Your priorities change and you lose sight of what used to be a priority. Circumstances change and you no longer have the same means to work toward things how you used to. Or even your interests could evolve into something that don't line up that vision you used to have for yourself. And sometimes we can go so far down the path without realizing we’re doing it, and when we look back we see how different things were then we expected, and give up on feeding that fire.

That’s why I want to share this quote with you - “It’s never too late to be what you might have been.” Just because you’ve been out of shape for a few years now doesn’t mean that you can’t still get into the best shape of your life. Just because you neglected certain relationships doesn’t mean that person is gone and out of your life forever. Just because you have a certain reputation right now does not mean that the way others perceive you will always be that way. Just because you had a dream, and you expected to be further along on it by now, does not mean that it’s out of reach.

You can make the choice at any point to change your life! I mean this. But so often we disqualify ourselves because it seems like there’s so much that needs to be overcome to make things right. That’s a limiting belief. It’s self-sabotage, and the best day to reclaim the things that are most important to you in your life, is today. “It’s never too late to be what you might have been.” That word ‘might’ is indefinite and undetermined. As long as it’s undetermined you can still create it for yourself.

On your personal development journey, you need to be sure you have the right foundation in place. Discover the 7 Fundamentals To Self Improvement and instantly accelerate your growth! (Who knows what you might be overlooking and how it’s holding you back…)

If you’re in the US or Canada, text me at 949-799-0788 and I’ll send you daily text messages that help you grow and discover yourself every day. 

Something that I think many people desire in life is to live with more passion. They want to genuinely care more about the things they do, contribute toward something that they find meaningful, and feel the emotions of life. I do believe that the quality of our life is closely related to the quality of the emotions we feel, and passion is an incredible source of filling your world with positive and fulfilling emotions.

But something that is misunderstood, and reveals a great truth about passion, is its true etymological meaning. It comes from the latin root word “pati” which means 'to suffer'. This suggests that the things we care most about, that lights up our heart, comes from a place of suffering rather than joy.

This might come as a surprise to you because we have such positive associations with passion. We’re all told to pursue what we’re most passionate about. And that’s because you can harness an incredible sense of purpose and fulfillment by contributing toward something that is connected to your own personal pain.

This relates back to another piece of advice I heard recently, which is that you are most capable of helping the person you once were. Read that again - You are most capable of helping the person you once were. This is in business solving someone’s problems and being paid for it, offering support and guidance to a family member or friend, or even in a more formal role through volunteerism. We feel called to support people in that way because we know how hard it can be, how painful it can be, and it’s meaningful to be a part of alleviating that pain for others.

For example, I am deeply passionate about helping people believe that they can change the world. I want to help people who have so much to offer and who have really, really good intentions, overcome the roadblocks in their path keeping them from becoming who they know they can be. 

This passion comes from the most challenging moments of my life. I’ve always believed in my heart that I’m going to change the world, and after college I got into a great job but one where I felt like I was replaceable and not making a unique contribution. I was a star athlete and Dean’s List student, and when all of that was stripped and I became just another person in the workforce, I lost sight of what I was capable of and started to doubt if I was good enough to do what was on my heart. My passion comes from a version of my personal suffering.

All that to say, lean into the pains and adversities of your life. Your experience makes you uniquely qualified to help people in ways others can’t. And to internalize this right now I want you to ask yourself this question - What have I experienced that I’m really passionate about helping other people with?

On your personal development journey, you need to be sure you have the right foundation in place. Discover the 7 Fundamentals To Self Improvement and instantly accelerate your growth! (Who knows what you might be overlooking and how it’s holding you back…)

If you’re in the US or Canada, text me at 949-799-0788 and I’ll send you daily text messages that help you grow and discover yourself every day.