I don’t mean to assume but I’m guessing that the reason you’re reading this is because you want to positively change your life. You know that you need to become something different in order to have something different, with that something different being more joy, purpose, impact, fulfillment, peace, bliss, or whatever it is for you.

But doing the right things to evolve into the next best version of ourselves is a daunting task.

Where do you start, what do you focus on, and how do you know it’s going to work?

There’s no one right answer to that, but I do want to offer a perspective that might be different than anything you’ve ever heard before that could give you a new thing to try.

Fundamentally we want to change ourselves. With improved mindsets, emotional intelligence, physical fitness, habits, and routines we become capable of more than we were before. We want to make improvements to how we operate at our core. People call this your identity.

So how do you change your identity? Aristotle says that “We are what we repeatedly do.” This suggests that what we do, our behavior, is the vehicle for transforming who we are in our identity.

The truth of this philosophy is confirmed through the validity of expressions like “consistency is key” and “the compound effect” and “take imperfect action”. They all make the same argument to emphasize how critical our behavior is in our personal development.

Now let’s take it one step further, and this is the step most people miss. What is required to take consistent action? You might think it’s will-power or motivation. Those are both unsustainable sources that might work in the short-term but won’t last in the long run. The most enduring, effective, unrelenting influence to your behavior is your environment.

Surround yourself with people who are fit and you’ll find yourself working out more and getting in better shape. Immerse yourself in the wisdom of successful business people and you’ll learn the right actions to take to make your business succeed yourself. Use accountability and commitments to encourage you to make better choices that lead to healthy and productive actions.

If you want to change your life, change your environment and everything else will flow from there.

This is the change yourself chain: New environments lead to new actions lead to new identities.

So change up the layout of your office, work at a new coffee shop, boldly share an ambitious goal that you have to make you feel more accountable to pursuing it,  or make a pact with a friend. Try doing things that change the physical, emotional, and social environment around you, and see how it goes.

You could probably attest to the fact that people are busier than ever. In fact you may even feel that way about yourself.

As you know, being so time-restricted can have some unfortunate consequences - Important things are neglected or deprioritized and daily expectations aren’t sustainable, basically acting as a ticking time-bomb that will inevitably go off and create fallouts within your physical health, relationships, and sanity.

If any of this sounds like you, the good news is you can still do something about it. Except for in extremely dire circumstances, nothing in life is permanent. There are always new balances to strike and new ways to design your life inputs so that it creates new outputs.

The first, most fundamental shift you can make to achieve more work-life balance is to establish your order of priorities. So many of us allow everyone else to determine the way we spend our time, causing us to be more reactive to the things around us rather than proactive about how we want them to be.

More specifically, the shift is to schedule your personal life before your work. The way you spend your time is a reflection of your priorities, so if you feel like you’re neglecting important things, it means that you need to reevaluate the way you structure your time.

If you feel resistant to this idea, isn’t it worth a try? Just try blocking off portions of your calendar and enforce it. You’ll find that this causes everything to shift to accommodate the new intention, and by necessity you’ll start to create efficiencies and stronger criteria around what actually deserves your time so that you can make it all work.

To put it another way - You are a person with a career, not a career with a personal life. Start getting the order right and you’ll find that not only that this is best for you, but it’s also best for your career. Subconscious transformation expert Jim Fortin has a quote that goes “the doing is only as good as the being doing the doing”. 

If you feel like you only have 50% of yourself to give because you’re burning the candle at both ends, then maybe it’s time to start adding more quality to your life. This will change everything from the inside out!

When it comes to living a full and high-quality life, all of that needs to point to one specific thing that it’s all about. Some people call it happiness and joy, others call it fulfillment and life peace - Only recently have I been encouraged to think about it through a new lens, which is bliss.

When you imagine bliss in your life it involves a few things. It’s the serenity of feeling fully safe, secure, and untroubled. It’s being overwhelmed with gratitude and appreciation for all that you are and all that’s to be. It’s having a full and expanded consciousness around your current state, allowing you to be deeply in the present and clear on your life’s purpose.

Bliss is the catch-all that everything good fits within.

As someone who is pursuing a more blissful life for myself, I’m realizing that it’s more about what you don’t do than what you do. Feeling so self-assured that you can reject the temptation to judge or compare to others. To never compromise your values or integrity in what you do. To live without worry or doubt and a full faith in the process around you.

Just like we’re always connected to abundance (and our mission is to remove all of the things getting in the way of us having a clearer signal), we already have bliss inside of us in every moment and we need to peel back the layers of things that are keeping us from seeing it.

Bliss is a state, meaning it’s a physiological and emotional presence. It’s not determined by the intensity of an achievement, it’s more enduring than that and lives on long after the moment has passed.

At the moment I’m pursuing bliss by cultivating more mindfulness in my life, more intentionality in the choices I make, more clarity in the things I want to do and be a part of, and more gratitude for the way life is beautifully unfolding before me with divine design.

Do I still have bad days? Of course. Do I still get upset, ticked off, and frustrated by things that aren’t worth it? You betcha. But those things are becoming less frequent and my overall life experience is improving by pursuing this beautiful thing called bliss.

When we encounter a problem we typically want to solve it as fast as possible. If it’s a problem that means that it’s creating some form of discomfort, and we’re extremely motivated to alleviate it as quickly. However, if we go too fast we may implement a solution that only lasts temporarily and creates a recurring problem.

So the advice is to find at least 3 different solutions to a problem before taking action on it. Yes, this extends the amount of time you’re in immediate discomfort, but it allows you to arrive at a better path forward to more adequately address the problem. The pause to find different perspectives allows you to be more intentional about the future you’re choosing, with all implications considered, rather than take action in a way that is appealing in the short-term.

The way to see things through different perspectives is to ask different questions about it. For example, if you reflect on a certain situation by asking the question “How is what’s happening actually the very best thing that could be happening right now?”, you’re going to get some really optimistic ideas. 

To really make this point clear, consider the difference between these two questions: “What do I want to do about this that is the best decision in the long-term?" and “What do I want to do about this that solves this problem the fastest?”

Tony Robbins says “The quality of your life is determined by the quality of the questions you ask.” Unsurprisingly, it was a Tony Robbins suggestion to try to find 3 solutions to a problem before moving forward with any of them.

So the next time you find yourself trying to solve a problem - whether it be in your personal life, at work, in relationship with someone else, or wherever it might be - think about the different perspectives you can employ to arrive at three unique solutions, and make your best decision from there.

Maybe I’m just speaking for myself, but have you ever found that you give such good advice for other people but have a hard time taking it for yourself? Instead of feeling confused or like a hypocrite about it, hopefully an explanation and new perspective can help you unlock all the value you have to offer.

First, if you’re giving good advice, that means you have the information. This is great news! With good information you have good ideas about how you can solve problems in your life, relate with situations in better ways, and get resourceful to implement positive change.

But again, if you have all of this information but you have a hard time applying it for yourself, that can feel hypocritical. But don’t believe that it means there’s anything wrong with you. There’s one fundamental difference between the advice that you give to others and the advice you integrate for yourself.


That difference is emotions.

When you’re giving advice, you can step into a more objective awareness, allowing you to see the big picture and assess how everything comes together. This is much harder to do for yourself because, well, it’s your life. There’s so much more pain and connection to everything going on that you draw conclusions that are biased. Understand that this is happening unconsciously. 

Our emotions create an environment that our rational mind makes decisions within. The challenge is that we’re often not aware of the influence our emotions are having on us in the moment. This causes the thoughts we have to seem to completely logical when truthfully they’re coming through the filter of your current emotions.

This is one of the reasons why it’s good advice to “sleep on it”. Instead of making a big decision or responding to something that upset you in the moment, you give yourself the space to return to a more unbiased state of mind to review what you actually want to do. 

So when you’re in the depth of a moment, with all of the emotions that it brings, and it feels hard to take your own advice, that’s why. The advice doesn’t seem as practical or valuable because your thinking is biased to see things a certain way. And that disconnect causes your mind to create a story about why the advice won’t work, or doesn’t apply, or you should do something else - which then discredits the quality of the advice.

One of the most important factors to long term, sustainable growth is patience.

Understanding the nature of how compounding works, whether it be in your bank account or in your own improvement, we know that it takes time to get the massive results we’re looking for.

Logically this can make sense but for many people their behavior is different, falling short of the big payoff they’re due. The main reason of this is the way our minds have evolved. We are wired for immediate gratification. When we experience pleasure or a reward shortly after doing something we feel compelled to repeat it.

This mechanism is in place because, back when humanity was evolving, we needed to be really attuned to the things that kept us alive in the short term.

However, now that we live much more advanced lives, the things that are “best” for us don’t usually provide immediate gratification. It’s not about doing things that keep us alive in the moment but rather doing the things that prepare us with the health, productivity, and relationships that make us feel most fulfilled. Again, sometimes that’s not the fun thing to do in the moment.

That’s why patience is such a critical link. The more we can practice patience, and delay the gratification of what we’re doing for a later moment, the more consistently we’ll be able to choose the proactive behaviors that create good results for us over the long-term.

Now let’s say that you are making the right choices. You’re eating healthy instead of indulging in sugary and fatty foods that taste good. You’re investing in building a skill in the short term that will become a pillar to your career a few years down the road...

You still may not feel like you’re being patient. You may feel frustrated the results aren't coming fast enough. You sense yourself getting distracted and your focus being pulled into other things...

But what’s really important to note is that patience is not about how you feel, it’s all about your behavior. As long as you’re engaging in patient behaviors then you’re continuing to place those deposits in your future. You’re feelings towards it are less important.

Now worth noting, there are definitely some ways to make behaviors that offer delayed gratification more pleasurable in the moment. Things like gamification, reward stacking, and self-acknowledgment can be used to close the reward loop in the short term for behaviors that work for you in the long-term.

No matter the approach, there’s not getting around the fact that great things take time, and the more patient you can be through it all, the bigger the pot is at the end of the rainbow. And there’s nothing that feels better, or is more worthwhile, than that.

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I think a lot of people can relate with having a desire to be more self-confident. When you’re self-confident you’re more decisive, you stand up for what’s right and what you want, and you give yourself a chance to succeed at the highest level. It takes courage to take a chance, call in a favor, or speak your mind - especially when that little voice in your head uses fear and anxiety to try to talk you out of it.

This is something that I’m actively working on. I know that on the other side of big bold actions are big bold results, and I have huge aspirations for who I want to become, what I want to create, and the impact I want to make in life. 

I have the same fear, doubts, insecurities, and mental roadblocks as anyone else, but what’s different is I’ve implemented some strategies to support me in being bolder that I wanted to share with you.

First is routine. I’ve added “make a bold ask” into my morning routine. The stress of it diffuses because it’s bundled into a bunch of other things that I’m doing, and I capitalize on that momentum to be able to follow through on the action. 

But even still, I found myself diluting the boldness of the action, doing just enough to convince myself that I had completed it. That fear, worry, and doubt was still coming up. The routine helped me to get into doing something, the next step was to improve the quality of the action.

So what I’ve been doing is doing my ‘bold action’ immediately after completing my breath work and meditation session. This allows me to maximize the effects of the state change I create in this practice. It leaves me less hindered, less inhibited, and less mentally restricted so that I can access that next level of boldness, and do that thing that I want to do but maybe I’m too afraid to do.

Now I haven't been doing this for too long, but I imagine that in time my threshold for what I’ll classify as ‘bold’ will continue going up. This means that over time I will systematically increase the bigness and boldness of my actions as part of this routine which will lead to more big and bold results.

To summarize what I’m doing to make being bold easier - First I’ve created an expectation that I’m going to do it every day. I’ve also attached it to a routine where I know I’ll have momentum to take action. And finally I’m inducing a state change to get over the things keeping me from being bold so I can tap into a richer sense of confidence.

If you’re looking to develop your self-confidence, get in the process of doing something consistently and it will naturally increase over time.

As we go through our lives, we want to feel good. Physically we don’t want to be in pain, we want to feel able and capable of being athletic and fit. Emotionally we don’t want to be in a dark and despairing place, we want to find hope and optimism in the world where we’re genuinely excited about everything happening around us. In relationships we don’t want to be overlooked, criticized, or put down, we want to feel self-confident and strong in who we are.

Well the good news is you can have all of that, even if you don’t feel like you have it right now, and that’s because “Feeling good has never been so easy.”

Of course, one of the main factors to how we feel are our circumstances. If we have money then we can afford things that make us feel physically comfortable, like a massage. If we’re free from tragedy in our lives we’re more likely to be in a better emotional place. And if we’ve been connecting well with our romantic partners and family, we’ll naturally feel more strength in our independence.

But circumstances aside, because they’re not permanent, how is it that ‘feeling good has never been so easy’?

It’s because we’ve lived more of our life. We have our full life’s experience to have the self-awareness to know what we like, what we don’t like, and what we want. This makes it easier to feel good, and as long as you keep on living, things will just keep getting easier as you pick up even more self-awareness.

So find solace in the fact that things are improving, things are getting better, even if they don’t presently feel like it. Sure, life has its ups and downs, but it’s always trending up over time and that’s because of the self-awareness we build. 

That’s not to say it’s easy to feel good, it’s certainly not. It takes a special person to be able to reroute a bad mood in an instant. But it has never been easier, especially when you incorporate the optimistic mindset that everything that happens to you is just another point of reference that helps you home in on exactly what you like and want.