Self Improvement Daily Podcast

The individual who encouraged me to seriously pursue personal development is Darren Hardy. He believes that consistency in positive choice is a foundation that will create massive change down the road, which has become a pillar in my life, and his challenge to define success has been equally influential. In an interview Darren shared a bit about something he believed lives at the cornerstone of his success, which is to fail quickly and massively. I’m still trying to understand exactly what I think about this concept, so I want to pass it off to you.

It goes to show that there is value in the negative as long as you know what to do with it!

A while back, I got up in the morning and got in the car to go to work, only to find that there was a crack in my windshield. It was disappointing of course, but it was small, so I didn’t think much of it. Then as time passed, the crack continued to creep further and further across my windshield until it got to a point where repairing it was unavoidable. So, I booked an appointment to get it fixed at the dealer.  

That was not the right decision. Not only was it much more expensive than it needed to be, but the dealership doesn’t accept insurance, and I got jerked around by the staff trying to get a ride, which made me late for work. It was frustrating and I was getting upset.

But, then I decided to take ownership of the situation. It was my fault that I let the car get to this point, and I could have managed the crack better before it required a full windshield repair. I could have been more proactive about reaching out to insurance earlier to understand how to best handle the situation, but I didn’t. Also, I have so many knowledgeable friends and family who could have guided me through the process of what I should have done, but I didn’t ask anyone which is my fault also. I realized that my frustration and emotion could have been avoided had I done something differently.  

After taking ownership, I was able to take a position of gratitude. How lucky I was to have a car, and for this repair to be the only thing I needed. There is so much worse out there and I tried to keep that in perspective.  The lessons I learned is don’t procrastinate when it comes to things you don’t know much about, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. I’ll take those with me for years to come

I’m taking you all way back today.  Back in high school, I adopted a mentality called, "Do it for the story". I was in my senior of high school and I wanted to get more out of life. I felt like I was just going through the motions in order to fit in, and I wanted to start living more. So, my buddy Dan and I created this, "Do it for the story" concept about putting yourself out there without expectation of what might happen, all while ready to seize opportunity when it presented itself.

Some unbelievable things have happened because I chose to do it for the story. I don’t want to get into too much detail about it because this was the topic of the TedX Talk I delivered. Watch it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1GE5CkiMLBI‍

How can do it for the story be incorporated on a daily basis? Well, it’s like the movie "Yes Man". If someones invites you to do something and you have a bunch of excuses why you don’t want to do it, but none of those excuses are any good, then you say yes and you give it a try. Just the act of putting yourself out there to expose yourself to new things presents unimaginable opportunity!

In life, there are things that happen, challenges that test to our core. Maybe the odds are stacked against you, or your at the mercy of things that are beyond your control. It might not be fair, and there might not be a solution, but you need to pull through anyway. Well, in light of those situations, it is possible to hit a mental reset to improve the situation if you’ll allow it.

“Even the worst days only last 24 hours”.

When experiencing hardship, you can frame your problems in a certain way that will help them go away. A new day is a new opportunity. You can always reset your emotions and build them back up from scratch if needed. This is a concept Admiral William McRaven shared in his famous commencement speech. McRaven talks about the value of making your bed every day because no matter what happens, coming home to a made bed reminds you that something went right and gives you optimism about tomorrow.  Similarly, when putting your head down at night, you can choose to be optimistic about how things will be the next day. It’s how thing work themselves out. Often times the energy you put out brings that energy back to you. With enough positivity and optimism that the new day will bring relief, you are more likely to find the relief you are seeking.

Can you think of one time when your bad days every lasted longer than 24 hours? I can’t. Welcome the new day with a new attitude and things will begin improving before your eyes!

On a long road trip, when your podcasts start sounding bland, your book on tape isn’t making sense any more, or you have nothing left to talk about with you shotgun rider, what do you do?  I imagine you start listening to music, right?

Even on short drives, and I can speak for myself, what I do while I’m driving really depends on my mood.  Sometimes I decide to crank up the volume and sing my heart out! I was doing that today on my way home from a visit, and I wanted to share some of the benefits of doing this.

First, music and specifically singing is a great way to express emotion. So, if you are sad and need to get it out your system, or happy and want to celebrate, singing is a great way to handle your emotion, releasing positive neurotransmitters and endorphins in the process.

On top of that, the nature of singing allows for quick deep inhales and long exhales, simulating yoga breathing and inducing similar effects. And some studies even suggest that people have a longer life expectancy when they sing often. 

But, the larger point I want to bring up, is we’ve all caught someone in the car next to us watching us sing wholeheartedly. As a response, we get embarrassed, self-conscious, and temper our singing. I am guilty of it too, but it’s ridiculous that a random stranger can dictate our behavior and affect us that strongly. I think we can make a statement to ourselves to sing louder, overcome that judgment, and continue reaping the benefits of singing in the car!

On Self Improvement Daily, we talk a lot about how to get things to go your way. But that’s not how life works, and we need to be prepared to deal with rejection, to have the right mentality that picks us back up, and to be ready to move forward. Alex Pirouz has a brilliant rule he calls the 4S formula.

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I really like this idea because it provides an action plan for when things don’t go right. You can immediately run through this checklist to get you back on track. Some will, some won’t, so what, but someone is waiting.

We don’t always need to do huge things, and bring massive change to our lives to make a significant difference. One of if not my favorite personal development books is the Compound Effect by Darren Hardy, which talks all about how making small positive decisions on a consistent basis makes a world of difference over time. Well, this concept is just one of those small things you can do to benefit your future self.

I’ll start off with an example that illustrates the concept well. I love water filters, and I finally realized why.  Every time I pour myself a glass of water, I was able to because I had previously filled up the container and gave it time to filter the water. This isn’t worth the excitement, I know, but  it’s a reminder that I took the time to do something I know would benefit my future self.  And to keep the cycle moving, I refill the container so I can do it all again.

The point is, take action in small ways that you know will serve your future self. It’s a morale boost because it presents itself as efficiency, productivity, and hope.

First, efficiency by doing a small action in the moment, you save yourself time in the future. And while you don’t know how valuable time is in that moment, it is refreshing to know that you prepared.

Productivity is about understanding the system, and taking action to be proactive about it rather than let it all build up.  

Hope is similar to how making your bed in the morning serves as a great reminder that you are capable of getting things done. Doing other small things will remind you that you’re moving the needle forward one way or another.

A few small things that come to mind that can serve you in a small way are, setting out your workout clothes beforehand, aggregating information or resources for meetings and calls ahead of time, and charging electronics before they completely need it. It instills a mentality that will help you make other small decisions, that turn into habits that compound and manifest in your life!

I saw a really powerful clip today that I wanted to share and elaborate on. It comes from Joel Brown, the founder of Addicted2Success.com, and an individual who has built a purpose driven empire online. His message is about embracing your uniqueness, specifically when it comes to pursuing your professional purpose.

It’s true, and Joel says it perfectly. Stay in your lane to achieve your god-given mission. We each have our own skill-set, our own speed, and our own path. Comparison can be dangerous because one person’s success is within their own context, that has aspects that likely doesn't apply to your own. So take a step back, have confidence in yourself, realize your capabilities and where they might lie. Know that your life and success is entirely your own and you shouldn’t compare it to others.