This thought comes from Cuyla Coogan, a woman leading members of the LGBT community, and encouraging others to be themselves and make a difference while doing so. She’s well versed in the challenges the LGBT community faces, and has experienced them firsthand. Her response to the adversity present is simply love. In the video,Cuyla reflects on the role love has played in her life, past and present.

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This is a special reflection. I experienced a similar resistance to love, I used to hold on to it too tightly instead of share it with others. But I’ve changed my ways and you can too. Love is the language of the universe and the world needs more of it. Be the difference you want to see in the world, and that difference starts with love.

This quote is all about awareness. When you notice something it comes into your awareness. Whether it's gaining awareness about yourself, starting to notice beauty, or finding clarity on a solution, there’s one commonality that encompasses them all. Nothing changed about the input, it was always there in front of you, you just weren’t noticing it. It was there before, during and after. It exists independent of you, and for whatever reason it all changes once you acknowledge it. That is awareness and it feeds our reality.

Now let’s be intentional about what we choose to be aware of, because while we can notice beauty, positivity, and hope in the things around us, we can also notice of monotony and hatred.  Acknowledging negativity is really important. Turning that energy into gratitude is a superpower that will serve you in life. Outside of that, how can we see more of the beauty around us?

For me, it's mindfulness and curiosity. Mindfulness helps us to be present, to appreciate simplicity, and to gain awareness on the mundane. Pairing that with curiosity, you can add a whole new layer to the mundane that elicits intrigue and perfect complexity.

When something is placed in front of you that comes into your awareness, do you take it as a given and it just plays a background role in your life, or do you choose to see the miracle that is in front of you? The rustling of the leaves can either be background noise or a unique display of physics that relied on generations of creation to design that exact moment. Life is full of beauty, it’s time that we noticed it!

I believe that we can all be better together, and that through teamwork, cooperation, and collaboration, we can create things larger than we could on our own.  When it comes to building a community, or leading a team, it’s not about anyone in particular, it’s about everyone!

Everyone needs to be bought into the same core mission. Everyone needs to play their role knowing that other people are accountable to their role. Everyone. 

If any one person starts going off script and acts in a way to cover themselves, it comes at the expense of the entire group. One of my favorite quotes is, “You are only as good as your weakest player”. When it comes to accomplishing more, it’s about raising the tide for all, not just yourself.

Another way to think about this is how Gary Vaynerchuk relates to it. In his pursuit to be the best businessman, he describes two different ways to have the tallest building in the city. You can either build the tallest building, or knock all of the other buildings down.

When you use this group oriented mentality, you choose to give instead of take, and in doing that you improve the ecosystem that you, then, can benefit from. It’s not about anyone, it’s about everyone, and this world is abundant enough to take care of us all!

This is a beautiful message from country artist Kasey Musgraves. It’s a reminder that no matter what you do, you’re never going to make everyone happy, and she approaches it from a funny and practical angle.

"If you save yourself for marriage, you're a bore
If you don't save yourself for marriage, you're a whore-able person
If you won't have a drink, then you're a prude
But they'll call you a drunk as soon as you down the first one

If you can't lose the weight, then you're just fat
But if you lose too much, then you're on crack
You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't
So you might as well just do whatever you want
So

Make lots of noise (hey)
And kiss lots of boys (yeah)
Or kiss lots of girls
If that's something you're into
When the straight and narrow
Gets a little too straight
Roll up the joint
Or don't
Just follow your arrow
Wherever it points, yeah".

There’s especially beautiful in this that we all can tap into.  In a life where we’re getting pulled in opposite directions by different people, we always have our own internal compass, our own guiding arrow, and it’s so important that we follow that intuition. No one knows what you want more than you do. Don’t resist it, don’t fear it, just follow it.

I came across a really inspiring, important moment that I want to share.  It was from Ellen Degeneres and about how she reacted to the confusion people expressed when they saw her sitting next to George W Bush at a football game. Ellen’s response was so pure, powerful, and a timely reminder that it’s okay to be different. Just because you disagree with someone doesn’t mean you can’t get along with them. It has gotten too polarized and people are forgetting that difference of opinion is actually a really great thing.

It doesn’t matter who they are, or what they believe, it’s important to be kind to everyone.

I see life sometimes as a math function. But, when you strip it down, all it really means is that you have an input, then that input gets changed into something else by the function,which produces an output. Not as complicated as you remember it being in high school algebra, is it?

Well, as it pertains to life, everything you experience is the input. Then your life experience, genetic predispositions, and other voluntary factors serve as the function that alters that input, and your left with your output, which is basically how your perceive it.

The quote, “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it”, shows just how powerful that function is. In fact, it argues that only 10% of the input is retained, and the function is responsible for 90% of the result. That’s where positivity comes in. When you make positivity, gratitude, and empathy default characteristics in your life, they influence the function that runs subconsciously, altering all inputs into a more positive, grateful, and empathetic interpretation.

The power we possess to choose or reality is incredible, and if we do the work through meditation, practicing consistent gratitude, and gaining self awareness, we can perceive a much more positive life.

I mean, life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it, and it’s your move to make that 90% right!

Special thanks to Ashley Gutierrez, who gave me this piece of advice. Don’t Look Away.

The easy and comfortable thing to do is to hide and avoid. Just to act like it doesn’t exist. What this does is it exacerbates the problem. In order for things to really change and improve, you need to acknowledge that they’re happening, and gain awareness on the issue. For me, being fully present, and allowing myself to experience everything the trip had to offer has inspired me to take take on a larger role. There’s something really powerful in facing the reality in front of you, and the easy thing to do is look away, but if you do you’re doing yourself and the problem a disservice.

Although I did bring up this point to add perspective, it is not meant to demean the challenges you are experiencing. In fact, it is meant to encourage you to address them as they are. I imagine there are some realities in your life that you are afraid to acknowledge. It could be an issue in a relationship, or the state of your finances.  But the longer you look away and avoid that reality, the deeper roots it will grow and the more dissociated you will become from the issue.

With this all in mind, I feel called to find more ways to support. It comes in big ways, like fundraising a new housebuild, and in smaller ways, like hearing someone’s personal challenge and sharing resources that I have found valuable. Whatever it is, please feel free to reach out, and whatever you do, don’t look away.

Don’t say you're sorry.  This doesn’t mean, however, to not admit when you’re at fault. I think communicating to someone that things didn’t meet expectations is extremely important.  It’s all about how that gets communicated, whether it be from a scarcity mindset, or an abundance mindset.

If you say “I’m sorry”, it suggests that it was an entirely negative experience. It presents the situation as a burden or a misfortune that you need to apologize for. This comes from a scarcity mindset because it implies that there’s not enough to go around, and you need to make amends for what you took from them, which could be their time, energy, money, or emotions.

The alternative is to approach the situation from an abundance mindset. The counterintuitive part is that you can still acknowledge something didn’t go to plan and be positive about it. For example, if you were late to something, instead of saying "I’m sorry for being late", say "I appreciate your patience". What this does is it takes the negative affect from the circumstance and reframes it to highlight a positive part of it. You choose to mention a positive quality that was put on display as a result of the error. Not only does it make the mistake you’re apologizing for seem less significant, but it helps reduce the interpersonal tension moving forward.   

I love this idea because I’m guilty of it, and just starting to bring my own awareness to it. So, the next chance you get, when you’re about to apologize and say you’re sorry, think about how else you can communicate the same message, but in a positively framed way!