Self Improvement Daily Podcast

I’m going to challenge you with this one because it is really uncomfortable by nature, but if you can manage it, you are 10 steps ahead of everyone else. The reason it’s so hard to do is literally because only one person can do it.

Challenge yourself to be the person that goes first. Whether you speak first in a string of presentations, ask the first question after a speech, or even you’re the first one to go down a scary waterslide, going first is a small act but has large implications.  

One part is the mentality associated with it. Going first requires confidence because you are the one to break the barrier and set expectations for everyone else, which is a lot of pressure. This is just like standing out in a crowd. This also builds a confidence that will be on display in other parts of your life.

The second part is what it can do for relationships. We all have a natural egocentrism, and place a huge priority on things that pertain to ourselves. This means that when we are waiting for our turn, we pay less attention to other people until we have had our turn. By going first, you can give everyone your full attention. Also, you will be better positioned to have a more productive follow up with that individual that will strengthen the relationship.

Implementing this tip is pretty easy. Make yourself go first the next time you can. It’ll be nerve-wrecking, and uncomfortable, but for the best. Just do it and find out why!

Chalene Johnson is a fitness influencer who has built a great personal brand through curiosity marketing. Let’s hear from Chalene as she describes why curiosity is so strong.  

Johnson states, "Our brains do not like to have a gap. It's like when your parents gave you a little bit of information when you were little, and you knew it wasn't the whole story, so your mind fills in the gaps. We want to connect the dots. So, when we can't connect the dots, it is a more powerful captivator than even our fear of loss is our desire to quench our thirst for curiosity".
This message is to instill curiosity in those around you. This is a really good way of getting your audience to engage with your message because it works within our natural inclination to seek more information. A few things Chalene does on her social media accounts to drive engagement is she generates curiosity by being intentionally vague and planning follow up posts that answer questions she asks. She has used curiosity marketing to do a great job selling not only her products, but herself.

Let us welcome Erik Eklund, a Swedish keynote speaker and storyteller. Eklund shares a bit about the two ways that we perceive our goals known as Approach and Avoidance Behavior.

"What do you want? It is one of life's most commonly asked and received questions. Yet, it is one of life's most difficult ones to answer. Now, consider this, our goal in life goes in one of the two ways. We either move towards them or away from them. This is known as the Approach and Avoidance Behavior. In avoidance, we are on the defense. We keep seeing the risks of negativity, and we limit everything in our life's. We wave things for what we want to happen to us. However, in approach, we are on the offense. We see the rewards and the possibilities. We strive to open up for opportunities and to create and make it happen. In approach, we can achieve what, at first, seemed impossible. So, here it is. Tip of the day is to get extreme clarity on what team you are on. So, here you go! My question to you is what do you want? If your answer begins with what you do not want, as in 'I do not want to feel hurt, or I do not want to have a bad relationship. Then, you are on the defense team of Avoidance. Move into offense. Move into the Approach team. Raise your standards and make it happen. What team are you on? The defense or the offense".

Do you ever feel like something happens and it is the end of the world, only to realize a few days, weeks, or months later, it wasn’t as big of a deal as you thought?  It’s human nature and you’re not alone, it happens all the time.  And I’ll admit, those emotions feel very real, but there are things you can do to make them more manageable in that moment.  

Try to write down your issue so you can revisit it at a later date, or as I call it, “Write and Revisit”.  This came up in a podcast interview I was in recently, and I wanted to take this time to share my thoughts in full.

The Write and Revisit Method works because the physical action of writing your concern down addresses the issue face on, as you are actively working through it. This then operates in two ways.  First, when you reread the problem immediately, you can look at it more objectively because at that point it has been removed from yourself, and you may already feel better about the situation. Second, and what I prefer to do, is I write down the issue in my journal “The Happiness Project”, ensuring that I am going to reread that segment in a years time. This puts everything into perspective and reminds me that time and life will go on regardless of this issue, which helps me move beyond it.  

Write and Revisit doesn’t have to be in year long spurts. It can be done in the amount of time feels right to you. What is important is that you write it with the intent to revisit it. So, with the next end-of-the-world event you face, try the “Write and Revisit” Method, and see how it makes you feel.

Matt Sheldon, a professional soccer player and founder of the insanely popular YouTube page and Brand called “Become Elite”.  Matt tells us a bit about a technique that helped him get to the top, called the 80 20 rule.

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Interesting concept, the majority of successes come from doing just a few things really well.  What little things do you do lead to your success?

As a kid, do you remember hearing the expression “you can be whatever you want to be”? Even though I’m not a professional athlete, or an author, , I still love playing sports and writing! I understand that life happens and it’s not always practical to be whatever you want to be, but that doesn’t mean you should stop working on things you love.

Lets discuss the importance of having a passion project. Whether that means you have an art studio in your house, a business on the side, or a self-care hobby, it is important to stay in touch with things you are passionate about.  

Beyond your extrinsic reasons, having a passion project will motivate you to be productive and efficient during the day so you can get to something you really enjoy. This outlet will also energize you because it wakes up your brain and stimulates your body. It also will get you in the habit of putting more effort into your work.

To start pursuing your passion, you first need to know what you’re passionate about. Simply reflect on your 5 happiest moments this past year and what caused that emotion. Then find a way to tie into your daily activity.

Let listen to this Ted Talk snippet from Phil Boissiere and a technique he developed to simplify how we practice mindfulness.

"Mindfulness. It has really become the buzz word in recent times. There is an abundant amount of research illustrating the positive affect that mindfulness practice has on the quality of life, improved focus, and decreased stress. Unfortunately, most of us tend to pump the brakes when we think about sequestering even a small amount of time to practice mindfulness. I paired one of the most basic breathing techniques alongside one of the most basic mindfulness techniques, thus, the three-by-three method was born. The three-by-three method is extremely simple. All you are going to do is identify one physical object in the environment, name it, and take one deep breath, and repeat it three times".

Next time you feel stress or want to re-center your emotions, try the three-by-three method to practice mindfulness.

You can avoid falling victim to the hindsight bias by practicing objectivity. Our brain is flooded by stimuli throughout the day, and it is impossible to remember everything. For that reason, our brains choose to fixate on certain things in particular that seem like they are worth remembering and everything else is purged. This is why it seems like something always happens, because the times it doesn’t happen aren’t encoded into long-term memory.  

Now how does this change our lives?  Well, the things we choose to remember are often negative and our mood and focus change as a result. With more distractions, we can’t get as much done. The fix is to take a moment to step away from an aggravating situation and look at it objectively. "Do I actually always miss this light?"  "Does he actually take long lunches?"  In some cases, sure, your feelings are justified, but very often you realize that your assumption is pretty flawed. Don’t let those negative emotions get you when they shouldn’t.

So, the next time you are annoyed about something that just doesn’t seem to be going your way, take a moment to reflect and see if that’s actually the way it is.