Becoming Wiser Or Wounded

Hey self improver, a better world starts with a better you and YES YOU CAN! So let's take another step toward your best self today.

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One of the biggest fears we all share is that we're afraid to look stupid. 

We think that if we go after a big goal and fail, other people will think less of us, or worse we’ll have to accept that we aren’t as good as we thought we were… 

We think that if we try our best but make a mistake, other people will think that we’re incapable and can’t be relied upon, or worse, we’ll destroy our own self-confidence…

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If you’re not living as big or as bold as you know your goals require of you, here are two things to think about: 

1) The more cowardly thing to do is to hide in your comfort zone than to be seen with your imperfections.

2) Not only do you earn others respect when you try and fail, but you believe in yourself more because you proved that you’re willing to do hard and scary things.

In every moment when we fall short of expectations, miss a goal, or don’t live up to our personal standards, we can either become wiser or wounded. 

‘Failure’ is a fertile soil for growth. Losing will teach you more than winning ever could because it offers you more feedback. But that’s only when you allow yourself to see your shortcomings as an opportunity for improvement with a growth mindset. That’s getting wiser.

Or, you can be wounded by poor performance. You see it as a reflection that you’re not good enough. That you’re wasting your time and never had it in you in the first place. Failure reinforces limiting beliefs, suggesting they’re more true than they are, which acts to hold you back out of protection.

The mantra to use, that epitomizes a growth mindset, goes: “Either I win or I learn, and learning is winning, so either I win or I win so long as I learn.”

It’s natural to feel disappointed when you fall short. It means you care. But in that moment, you get to choose what the long term implication of that instance is going to be: Either you become wiser or you become wounded.

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We’re predisposed toward self-preservation. Our unconscious mind chooses ‘wounded’. But we can overrule that and choose ‘wiser’. But first, you’ve got to put yourself out there and give yourself a chance to fail.

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