Catching Myself Judging The Woman At The Gym

I was on the treadmill at the gym and noticed a woman in front of me. She caught my eye because she seemed to be pacing back and forth across the gym floor between the bathroom and the lockers. I wasn’t paying very close attention but I don’t remember her doing any exercises or using the equipment.

What I did notice was how little clothing she was wearing. She was wearing tiny spandex workout shorts and a bright pink top that was mostly backless and wrapped low around her waist. It was a style I’d never seen before and more revealing than most workout clothes. And as a young, fit, and beautiful woman… I imagine I wasn’t the only person who noticed.

Between the walking around and the provocative clothing I caught myself making assumptions about her and her intentions. I reasoned that if she was at the gym and she wasn’t exercising, she must be there to be seen and show off. That she was trying to get people’s attention. As my mind was diving deeper into drawing conclusions, I became aware of my thoughts and paused them. I caught myself judging this woman and had no basis for any of the assumptions I had about her.

When you observe your unconscious thought patterns, you gain insight into your belief system. This instance triggered my own insecurities about being seen like that, and gave insight into how I was projecting based on what my intentions would have been if I were doing what she appeared to be doing. What I was thinking about this woman had everything to do with me and nothing to do with her. And fortunately, I knew that. 

Thoughts, conclusions, assumptions, judgments, biases… They’re all unconsciously running our minds at all times. The more we can be aware of them, the better we can understand ourselves. I do my best to understand the nature of my thoughts when I have the awareness to question them. I hope to learn more about myself in moments like this.

Do I know the truth and why this woman was behaving as she was? I have no clue. Maybe she was getting extra steps in between reps, maybe she was keeping her phone away from her so that she wouldn’t get distracted, and maybe she was trying to look hot. At the end of the day it doesn’t really matter. Her choices don’t impact my life but my judgments about her actions do. So I’m going to focus on the things within my control and take it as another reminder that I have more work to do on myself.

‍