Assume Success

A few weeks ago I was visiting my family and spent time with my brother and nephews. My 4.5 year old nephew, JT, is in a phase where after everything he says, he adds a drawn out “Right?”

“I get to pick my PJs, right?”

“We’re going to watch one show, right?”

“We’re seeing our cousins tomorrow, right?”

Most of the time the intention behind him saying it is that he knows it evokes a verbal acknowledgment. It’s his way of knowing that he’s being listened to. He’ll keep saying “right?” to get our attention until we answer “Yes, that’s right JT.”

But sometimes he uses it to be a clever, persuasive little boy. He asks for things in an assumptive way. Like saying “We’re having pizza for dinner tonight, right?” even though that wasn’t the plan at all. He positions what he wants in such a way that makes it harder to say “no” than it is to say “yes”.

And there’s something to learn in that. Humans take the path of least resistance. When we’re unconsciously navigating a path forward, we’re going to take the one that requires less effort. So if we can be creative about the way we relate with what we want, we can add friction to any alternative so that we’re more likely to get what we want.

It’s similar to a ‘glass half full’ approach. When your attention is fixated on all of the reasons why something can work, the variables that are in favor, and why success is a likely outcome - it influences the result. It inspires you to take more confident action. It encourages you to work through a challenge or setback. It gives you can make what’s on your heart a reality.

That, compared to the ‘glass half empty’ approach that comes more naturally. Our negativity bias automatically points out the things that are wrong with the plan and makes us focus on all of the things that are getting in the way. But when you let that be the line of thinking, your actions follow suit and you it manifests accordingly.

Kind of like a self-fulfilling prophecy - When you assume success, you show up as someone who expects it. But when you don’t, then you’re writing your own demise. Henry Ford said it best "Whether you believe you can or you can't, you're right!"

You get to choose which way you let yourself spiral: You can be uplifted with encouragement or slowed down by discouragement. And while most of this happens unconsciously and in ways you don’t control, you can still architect it in subtle ways. You can present yourself as if you already know that you’re going to get what you want, and success is presumed.

You want to make your dreams come true, RIGHT? Then you ought to root for them.