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October 28, 2019

Doing it for the 'gram?

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Let’s talk about an epidemic that the world is dealing with. In general, people care way too much what others think about them. I don’t know if social media has made people hyper-aware of others’ feedback, or it has been around for a while and has never had a forum for discussion. In either case, we need to do something about it.

First, I’m going to be my own devil’s advocate. Optics can be important. Behaving a certain way or being perceived as a certain type of person is important when trying to relate with someone. One of Dr. Robert Cialdini’s pillars of influence is “liking”. He talks about how others will want to work with you if you have more things in common. It’s a real thing that helps us accomplish what we want in life.

But that’s the key. It’s doing something that contributes to what you want to do, and not living to meet someone else’s expectations. In fact, there’s nothing wrong with wanting to have tens of thousands of followers on Instagram. At face value, that seems like a really superficial metric that leads to a lot of emptiness, and finding fulfillment in the wrong “fleeting” places, but if that’s a tactic that contributes to your larger goal? Then why not? In fact, that’s my strategy, because I believe the credibility and social proof associated with big Instagram accounts is worth the pursuit.

However, not many people have clarity on their reasons, and the problem that this all stems from is that many people are disconnected from their desires and hyper-focused on how they’re being perceived. There’s not much I can do to help with this. Of course, I’d be willing to ask the hard questions and have the conversation, but the growth needs to come from within you to gain clarity on your purpose. Thinking through that might help illuminate if you stand by your reasons for doing things, or if you’re doing it for the gram.

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